If you love Tyler Perry movies, then you probably already do love David and Tamela Mann, two of the cutest couples who work together and have a solid marrige of 28 years.
As someone who has not been married that long, I’m always on the lookout for actionable and practical marriage advice. Reading through some interviews and features of this couple, I gleaned some great marriage tips which I just had to share.
David and Tamela Mann’s Marriage Tips
#1 Have things you both enjoy together
David and Pamela Mann both act and sing together and were part of the same group for a long time. They do not just have similar interests, they also have the same career. In an interview, Tamela said:
“I wanted to marry someone that enjoyed and did the same things that I’ve done. We’ve built it all together and that’s really been a great blessing for us”
You might not have the same career and maybe you both have different interests, but it is important for couples to find something that they can both do together.
#2 Enjoy each other’s company
This is really important particularly for those who are not yet married. If you do not enjoy just spending time with someone and talking together, then that is a giant RED FLAG. You need to get out of that relationship!
If you are already married though, try to cultivate the habit of spending a little time together in each other’s company. As Tamela said:
“I’m still enjoying my life and marriage. And it’s not a put on, we just sit around day-to-day enjoying each other’s company without all the hooplah.”
#3 Make each other PRIORITY
Your spouse should be the most important person in your life (after God). Not your parents, siblings, not even your children. And definitely not your career. David Mann puts it clearly when he said:
“In this industry there’s something that we never balance and that’s our marriage and our family. There’s our marriage and family, then the industry,…We never give anything the same weight that we give our marriage and family because any time you balance something, you give it weight to balance it. Our marriage, our family, our relationship far outweighs anything we’ll do in this industry or in this business.
#4 Spice things up in the bedroom
With children, work, chores and life getting in the way, it’s kind of easy to just let things slip when it comes to the bedroom side of your life. This is a huge mistake and is often the first trouble spot in many marriages.
Asked how she keeps things lively, Tamela said:
“I do things to keep him turned on; it is never a dull moment. I try to give him a different lady- I may try to change my hair color or change up something, especially in the bedroom. I try to make sure he is keeping his eye on me.”
#5 Talk about everything and keep things open
No secrets, no hidden agendas, keep it open. This is very important for a marriage to succeed.
“We talk about everything. If something happens, we try not to go to bed angry with each other and whatever upsets me, we talk about it. Even if it takes calming down for a few minutes and then going back to it. We don’t let things fester a long time. We keep it all out in the open and we don’t have any agendas. Everything is together- there are no separate accounts. Everything has both of our names on it. This is how we keep everything open in our relationship so we can always put everything on the table.”
These are areas where a lot of couples struggle. Being open about everything and do not keep secrets. Seriously, secrets always have a way of coming back to haunt you. This is a really good one from David and Tamela Mann.
#6 Believe in a higher power
You both have to believe in something (preferably in God). Marriage is not easy and it takes faith to keep going. You cannot afford to make your spouse responsible for your joy, your peace of mind and your identity as a person.
“Faith has been everything in our lives, it hasn’t been just a minor role but THE role. We’ve been faithful to God and he’s been faithful to us. Without him we wouldn’t be where we are.”
If David and Tamela Mann actually practice these tips (and I think they do), they it’s easy to see how they are still in love after 28 years of marriage.
Do you have any marriage tips to share?