If you are unmarried and hitting the big Three Oh soon (or you’re like some of us and are celebrating the sixth, or seventh, or eighth anniversary of your 30th birthday), there’s the possibility that you might be feeling some anxiety.
Of course, not everyone is conscious of the ticking clock or stuff like that and you might actually be having the time of your life. But who are we kidding right? African parents and aunties seem to take delight in reminding you of your biological clock and all the ways your life seems to be lacking simply because you are not married by 30. That is enough to make anyone anxious.
If you are feeling that twinge of anxiety, we present in no particular order, 10 things you definitely should do if you are unmarried by the time you hit 30.
1. Call your best friend guy
Okay, this one is straight out of the movie, If Lucy Fell and my best friend guy and I watched it then (over a decade ago). For some strange reason, we decided to imitate the characters in the movie and we made a pact, not to kill ourselves, we are Africans after all. Instead we decided that if we were both single when we turned 30, we would marry each other. Thankfully, by the time I was 30, we were both married. But yeah, if you have a best friend guy like that, feel free to give him a call. Who knows, right?
2. Go and see your spiritual leader
This one is a favourite of Nigerian women. No husband, then you need prayers, maybe deliverance right? Seriously. If you have a spiritual leader that you trust, then by all means go see him or her. They might give you some insight into your person. I mean common, it’s not normal to be over the age of 30 and be so content and at peace with your unmarried status…is it? There are enough people who would try to make you think it isn’t. You need inner strength to be true to who you are.
3. Hold on to God
Hold on to your creator with both hands and legs. You are going to need the grace in the coming months because at every wedding you have the misfortune of attending, you are going to hear everything from tips on how to catch a husband, to advice on how you’re not getting any younger.
4. Keep that career in sight
If you are 30, unmarried and you have a career, then you are doing great babe. At least whenever you meet your Mr. Right, you will have your own source of income, which is really important, trust me. If you don’t have a career, it’s time to start working on one.
5. It’s time to visit a spa
Any reason is reason enough to visit a spa. This is a celebration of life…I mean, you are 30! Forget about your unmarried status and call up your girl friends (or go solo) for a little pampering.
6. Get started on your bucket list
If you have a bucket list, then it’s time to start ticking off the items one at a time. Travel, learn how to swim, sing on stage, go bungee jumping (if that’s your thing)…live your life! If you’re not sure how to get started, check this article on how to write a bucket list.
7. Fall in love with little old you
When a woman hits 30, it’s like you’re beginning another chapter of your life. You are no longer the childish you of your teens and early 20s, but you don’t exactly feel like a mature woman (definitely not like your mum). It’s time to explore who you are now and the best time to do that is before you have the complication of a husband and kids. Fall in love with yourself again and if you’ve never been before, this is your chance.
8. Get your act together
Look, if you have issues, they’re going to be magnified once there’s a husband in the picture so if you are 30 and are a hot mess, well this is your golden opportunity to get your act together.
9. Have a strong posy
Good girl friends are hard to come by, but if you have loyal friends then they are exactly what you need now. When the pressure from your mom or well meaning aunts gets too much for you to handle, your friends will help you get through the frustration with a laugh. If you do not have one single loyal friend, then refer to point #3 above.
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