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This one is really interesting. It turns out that if you’re not having regular sex in marriage, it could be affecting your mental health. So if you’ve been too busy (or too tired) to have sex with your husband and he’s begun acting kolo mental (crazy), ah…there’s a reason for that and it’s backed with studies and everything; it’s all scientific, at least that’s according to this article on the Punch Newspaper.
There are many reasons why two people might be in a sexless marriage – that’s a marriage where there’s little or no sex- and the writer mentioned some of the reasons. Here are some excerpts from the article.
On causes of sexless marriages in Nigeria: The facility of education and financial empowerment of our modern wives may serve as templates for more conflicts leading to ego-stalemates that may injure sexual intimacy. Our relatively lower rates of divorce, even among our educated couples compared with the western world, may find compensation in sexless marriages as manifestation of emotional divorce.
On general reasons why sex might be very low in some marriages: A partner may have feelings hurt repeatedly, get turned down too many times, get disrespected and neglected through faulty, defensive communication styles that do not allow issues to be resolved promptly. These chronic unresolved martial conflicts can generate a state of permanent hostility that blocks sexual expression.
The partner who behaves in a passive-aggressive manner may block sexual intercourse as punishment or protection from hurt inflicted by the mate. The perceived rejection may lead to loss of interest in sexual communication, which may be complicated by loneliness, anger and lowering of self-esteem in the spouse who feels that basic sexual human needs are deliberately frustrated by the rejecting partner.
Other causes of this resentment may be due to perceived imbalance of duties and responsibilities as touching in-laws, moral, religious and financial issues. This may get complicated when extra-marital expression sets in, which may lead to reduced sexual interest in the estranged spouse and if the affair is discovered, the innocent spouse may cease to want to be intimate with the offending spouse.
This may manifest as restricted, formal and coarse communication as partners treat each other with contempt. Couples in this situation are definitely in mental distress or already mentally ill, hence they require professional help.
So, now we know why some men (and women) are gradually going crazy. What are your thoughts on this?
You can find the entire article here.