Lunchtime at the Royal Exchange London

By Ibifuro Longjohn


Editor’s Note: Nigerians (and Africans in general) always have a pretty unique perspective about life. This post shares the comic thoughts of a Nigerian British woman who decided to have lunchtime at the Royal Exchange London. Prepare to be entertained. 🙂 

Royal Exchange London
Picture courtesy


Lunchtime at the Royal Exchange London is always an experience of a life time. Apart from the fine corporate dining, the atmosphere and ambiance always reeks of money, trade power influence and the typical English uppity.

The men looking debonair in their Savile row suits and well polished laced shoes that you could see your own reflection if you gazed at them for too long.

As for the women, they are dressed in pencil skirts and closely fitted blazers, women with razor-sharp cheeks bones, their hair the color of ginger ale, with three-inch Russel & Bromley stilettos, their faces sat frozen in feigned stoic mode. They only part their lips to put food in their mouths and also to make small talk with their colleagues. The restaurant staff seemed to be mainly Eastern European and Asian. There was no dark head in sight.

Royal Exchange London
Picture courtesy The Royal Exchange Cafe

I just wished they had pounded yam and Egusi soup stuffed with oxtail, shaki, ponmo, round about,cowleg, stockfish, periwinkles and mussels on their menu. That would really be a proper lunch delight. The lady sitting five tables from me urgently needs to eat a McDonald’s Double Whooper burger. They all look hungry but they seem to have eaten a two course meal.

Ha! I better just quietly chew the dry baguette they placed before me and sip on some English tea before someone notices my native traits. Why did i just think of Mr Ibu at this time??

Comport yourself, Ibifuro… Please behave!


© Eeebeephurow, 2017


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