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No one can love you as much as you love yourself. So many women go into marriage hoping to ‘find’ themselves either in the marriage or in their spouses. A lot of us have gone through life without any real experience of love; we did not receive it from our parents and we did not receive it from ourselves.
When you look to another person to make you complete or give you the love you never had, you are only setting yourself up for heartbreak.
First of all, most people tend to value things that already have value. If you place little or no value on yourself, how do you expect someone else to place much value on you?
Secondly, even if your spouse is an exceptional person and still loves you in spite of yourself, because you do not love yourself, you are probably going to find it difficult to believe that anyone can love you when even you can’t love you.
You have maybe been through some situations in your life, done some stuff that you regret and so you might believe that you are not worthy of love. But the truth is everyone is worthy of love and no one is worthy of love. It is not anyone’s right to be loved, and yet, nobody deserves to go through life unloved, certainly not you.
It would be nice if you are surrounded by people who love you. But experience has shown that even those who come from loving families do not know how to love themselves. If you fall into that category (and even if you don’t), here are a few tips on loving yourself:
Speak respectfully and lovingly to yourself
If you love someone, you will not insult the person. You will want to avoid saying hurtful things to that person. So why do you say all those nasty stuff about yourself? Learn to tell yourself good and positive things and stop dwelling on your physical imperfections, unless you can do something about it.
Don’t treat yourself badly
You starve yourself, eat all sorts of harmful things, wear things that you would mock on someone else…why? Do you think you don’t deserve to be treated right? Forget about how people have treated you in the past (or how they are still treating you) and instead, give yourself the royal treatment.
Take care of yourself
Take yourself to the salon, get a pedicure if you can afford it or else give yourself one at home. Exercise and stay healthy. Be very meticulous about your surrounding, what goes in and on your body. Just the way you will look out for your child and make sure he or she is well taken care of, you must also look after you.
Do nice things for you
You do not have to wait for someone else to do something nice for you. Take yourself out on a date. You can go catch a movie or go to that restaurant you really like. Or when the children are all asleep, bring out the entire series and make yourself feel good with Olivia Pope.
Make yourself happy!